My cat Monkey hates love.

I had All Star stuck in my head today and after a minute or two of mumbling the lyrics to myself as I went about my business, I realized that I somehow have the entire thing memorized. I’ve taken multiple algebra classes in my lifetime and don’t remember a damn thing from any of them but I can perfectly recite some shitty Smash Mouth song I haven’t heard in years no problem, I hate everything

We bought bagel chips from our favourite local bagel joint today and I was all jazzed for a snack attack until I realized they mixed the garlic and cinnamon sugar chips in the same package. How could you do this to me, Bagel King, I trusted you